“Covenant is the silk that joins Unitarian Universalist congregations, communities, and individuals together in a web of interconnection. The practice of promising to walk together is the precious core of our
“Covenant is both a noun and a verb. It can be a written agreement among individual community members promising to behave in certain ways, and it can mean to engage in mutual promises with Spirit, with other people
from UUA.org
First Church in Jamaica Plain Covenant of Relationship
Approved by congregational vote on May 19, 2019
As members of First Church in Jamaica Plain Unitarian Universalist, we believe that building community is an ongoing spiritual practice. In order to grow together and deepen the connections among us, we hereby resolve:
To listen with care:
- We will value differences.
- We will avoid demeaning and hurtful interactions
- We will provide each other with support and continued presence.
To address each other directly:
- We will speak when silence would restrain progress.
- We will share disagreements and concerns with the person who inspires them rather than with others.
- We will express appreciation and respect for gifts of time, skill, and money.
- We will correct misunderstandings and see disagreements as an opportunity for growth.
- We will say when we are angry or hurt. We will ask for help when we need it.
- We will seek mediation when needed.
To sustain and build our community:
- We will value every member and welcome every newcomer.
- We will honor our commitment to diversity in sexual orientation and gender identity, race, ability, class background, spiritual beliefs, and religious practices.
- We will care for our building as the vessel of a rich history.
- We will implement Unitarian Universalist principles of respect, generosity, and a deep commitment to justice.
- When we feel we have failed, we will try again.
This is the covenant we make with each other.
What is a Covenant?
Every group or community has norms and expectations of behavior. Sometimes these are implicit and we expect people to absorb them from daily life. Sometimes they are directly spelled out in rules or promises. Most Unitarian Universalist congregations have written agreements about how members treat one another: these are created and adopted by the congregation, and ideally revisited regularly.
These can include things like “We promise to address each other directly rather than asking others to speak for us” and “We speak up when we feel hurt and listen with an open spirit when we cause hurt.”
These are called “covenants of right relationship” or “behavioral covenants.” In this context, “covenant” means promise or commitment. Covenant has been called “the silk that joins UU congregations, communities, and individuals together in a web of interconnection.”
A Covenant of Relationship is different from a Covenant of Purpose or Bond of Fellowship like the one that was said at the beginning of worship at First Church. Covenants of Purpose often clarify collective purpose and vision. The statement formerly said at First Church was an adaptation of the Ames covenant, written by Rev. Charles Gordon Ames for his Unitarian congregation in Philadelphia. Our congregation’s minister introduced it here in 1882.
A Covenant of Relationship is also about the process of its creation. This kind of covenant must be created by the community, and explicitly named and agreed to.
Rev. EB and the Ministerial Committee led a process to create a Covenant of Relationship for First Church, which was approved by the membership in 2019.
About Covenant, Conflict, and Community
On Covenant
Side With Love
Rev. Elizabeth Nguyen & Nora Rasman
Statement from the Commission on Institutional Change: January 18, 2019
“When relationships break down, covenants are most likely to be violated—and this is the time when they are most important.”
What They Dreamed Be Ours to Do: Lessons from the History of the Covenant
Rebecca Parker, Starr King School for the Ministry
White Supremacy Culture — Still Here (2021) by Tema Okun
