A Memorial Service is a celebration of life and a spiritual practice of being together in grief. In Unitarian Universalist congregations, these services are developed by the family of the deceased and the presiding minister to specially honor the memory of the individual.

The service usually includes the following elements:

• A brief eulogy given by the Minister, including a “sketch” of the the deceased’s life.
• Personal remembrances offered by 2-3  speakers (family and friends)
• Readings of poetry and/or Scripture
• A time for communal sharing
• Piano music

The Church provides:

• The service itself, planned by the Minister with the family’s input
• Creation and printing of 75 color programs/orders of service
• Ushers
• Assistance organizing a simple reception in the Parish Hall (members of the church provide this on a volunteer basis)

The Church does not provide:

• Flowers (members of the church sometimes provide this on a volunteer basis)
• A guest book
• Full catering

Memorials for members of the UU Church in Jamaica Plain and their close family are part of our work as a church and are free, except a Sexton payment.

Memorials for extended family, or for people not connected to this congregation, require payment to the Minister ($385), Musician ($350), and Sexton ($25/hr for a minimum of 3 hours). They also require a donation to cover the use of the building use.

First Church recognizes that “family” is a diverse concept with no set definition, and we trust our members to understand their own families best. “Close family,” for this purpose, includes, but is not limited to, members’ spouses, domestic partners, parents, siblings, or children, and may include “chosen family” who are emotionally closer to the member than their relationship would immediately indicate. Members will be allowed to make this distinction in their times of grief.

We note that that our members are sometimes estranged from their families of origin for reasons related to religion, sexual orientation, and/or gender identity, and this policy is intended to privilege compassion and openness over rigid ideas of family.

Memorial Planning Guide:

• Send an email to both Rev. Elizabeth and Helene to schedule the service. People often choose a Saturday or Sunday afternoon several weeks after their loved one’s death. People often need to check with family coming from out of town, so let us know if you need to do that. (You can say something like “we’d like their memorial on a weekend within the next month, but it can’t be ___ date,” or “we would like to wait until the spring: can you suggest a date?”)
• We will need to confirm Rev. Elizabeth and Andrei’s availability, as well as check the building schedule before we finalize the date, so please wait for our confirmation before publicizing the service.
• Next, please fill out our memorial service planning form.
• Schedule a meeting with Rev. Elizabeth to plan the service.